lundi 29 mars 2021

Betty / Betty de Tiffany Daniel


Betty est la 6ème des huit enfants nés de l'union de Landon Carpenter, indien Cherokee, et de Alka Lark, blanche qui, en l'épousant, a tourné le dos à une famille haïe. Un drôle de couple formé un jour d'orage de 1930 dans un cimetière de l'Ohio, État qui les a vu grandir et où ils retournent s'installer après des années sur les routes pendant lesquelles Landon s'est épuisé à toutes sortes d'emplois et qu'Alka mettait au monde Leland, Fraya, suivis de Yarrow et Waconda décédés en bas âge, puis les deux plus jeunes filles Flossie et Betty née en 1954 et enfin les deux petits derniers, Trustin et Lint. De tous les enfants, Betty est celle qui ressemble le plus à son père qui la surnomme "petite indienne" alors que le métissage des autres penche plutôt du côté de leur mère au teint et aux cheveux clairs ; une famille solide dans laquelle chacun a sa place et sa particularité, Flora est l'étoile qui rêve d'Hollywood, Betty passe son temps à écrire des histoires, Trustin dessine et Lint, à l'esprit tourmenté, collectionne les cailloux. Ils emménagent à Breathe dans une maison abandonnée que personne ne veut à cause d'un drâme non élucidé qui s'y est déroulé des années auparavant (la disparition de toute une famille jamais retrouvée et des traces de balles aux murs).
Alors qu'un mystérieux tireur nocturne hante les nuits de Breathe, Betty va y faire sa première rentrée à l'école et grandir en nous racontant la chronique familiale, sa vie de métis indienne dans une société ouvertement raciste, les secrets percés au fil du temps, son rapport très particulier avec sa mère hantée par des traumastismes d'enfance, ses relations avec son père et les frasques avec sa fratrie.
 
Ces personnages inoubliables de Betty et de son père ont été inspirés à l'auteur par les récits de sa mère sur son grand-père. Cette figure paternelle hors normes, lumineuse, d'une profonde humanité est une source d'admiration et d'inspiration pour ses enfants à qui il raconte toutes sortes d'histoires leur permettant de se construire sur le chemin semé d'embûches menant à l'âge adulte. Un homme malmené à cause de ses origines et de la couleur de sa peau mais qui, finalement, sait qui il est, un être en accord avec lui même et avec la nature, homme-médecine grand connaisseur des plantes à la main verte toujours tendue, d'une générosité et d'une empathie sans limite pour les autres. Il forme un couple improbable avec Alka, véritable soutien pour cette femme hantée par une enfance dont les secrets pèseront sur ses enfants, en particulier Betty, avant que cette dernière ne parvienne à rompre le cercle vicieux se reproduisant d'une génération à l'autre. 

Et pour Betty, cette "Petite Indienne", que d'embûches et quel parcours ! Il en faut de la résilience et de la force de caractère pour surmonter les injustices, les préjudices, pour s'accepter et finalement grandir. Il y a heureusement l'amour de ce père merveilleux mais aussi de formidables rencontres, des moments initiatiques heureux ou dramatiques, le rapport à l'écriture qui sert parfois d'exutoire, et enfin, un véritable choix de vie, celui de nourrir le "bon loup" qui sommeille en elle.

Ce livre est tout simplement bouleversant et j'avoue avoir eu la gorge serrée et versé quelques larmes à plusieurs reprises, ce qui ne m'arrive pas si souvent. Malgré la lourdeur de beaucoup des thèmes abordés - racisme, violence, dépression, harcèlement, inceste, viol, pauvreté, menaces, etc.- avec  quelques passages particulièrement éprouvants et douloureux, le texte ne tombe jamais dans le sordide. La voix de Betty reste celle de l'innocence, un regard pur qui certes s'endurci avec le temps mais qui ne juge pas les autres et veille au contraire à préserver la dignité de chacun. Et comme le don de Betty c'est d'écrire, le texte est à la hauteur, magnifique et plein de poésie. 
Et pour ne rien gâcher, on apprend en plus, au passage, quelques éléments très intéressants sur la culture Cherokee.

Un roman exceptionnel, Betty et son merveilleux père sont non seulement entrés dans mon cœur, ils y sont gravés de façon indélébile. ❤️❤️❤️

Tirés du texte :
 My father descended from the Cherokee through both his maternal and paternal lines (...) Following our bloodline back through the generations, we belonged to the Aniwodi clan. Members of this clan were responsible for making a special red paint used in sacred ceremonies and wartime. 
"Our clan was the clan of creators," my father would say to me. "Teachers, too. They spoke of life and death, of the sacred fire that lights it all. Our people are  keepers of this knowledge. Remember this, Betty. Remember you, too, know how to make red paint and speak of sacred fires." 

Before Christianity, the Cherokee celebrated being a matriarchal and matrilineal society. Women were the Head of the household, but Christianity positioned men at the top. In this conversion, Cherokee women were taken from the Land they had once owned and worked. They were given aprons and placed inside the kitchen, where they were told they belonged. The Cherokee men, who had always been hunters, were told to now farm the land. The traditional Cherokee way of life was uprooted, along with the gender roles that had allowed women to have a presence equal to that of men. 

Nature speaks to us. We just have to remember how to listen. 

Through his stories, I waltzed across the sun without burning my feet. 
My father was meant to be a father. And despite the troubles between him and my mother, he was meant to be a husband, too. 

Did you now that smoke is the mist of souls?  (...)  That's what makes it so sacred and able to carry your fear up to the clouds, which is the home of the fear eaters (...) good little creatures who will devour all that frightens you so you don't have to be afraid anymore. 

Not only did Dad need us to believe his stories, we needed to believe them as well (...) what it boiled down to was a frenzied hope that there was more to life than the reality around us. Only then could we claim a destiny we did not feel cursed to. 

You know what the heaviest thing in the world is, Betty? It's a man on top of you when you don't want him to be.
 
I wrote as if it was flooding from my fingertips. All the cruelty, all the pain, I wrote it all in a story that was destroying me even as I created it. 
I folded the pages against my chest. I tried to suffocate them as I went into the garage for an empty jar and a hand shovel. Back at A Faraway Place, I crawled under the stage and broke the cold earth with the shovel. When I got the hole dug, I placed the jar inside as I repeated what my mother had said. " Bury 'em so deep, no one knows about' em except for them and us."

Your mom found me (...) I was a lost man, but, somehow, she still found me. I had neither a purpose nor a name before your momma. When I was growin' up folks called me Tomahawk Tom or Tepee Jack or Pow-wow Paul, every names but my own. No one ever even asked me my name until your momma did. Not only did she ask, but she tagged a 'sir' on the end of it. "what's your name, sir?"  I had never been called 'sir' before. 
 
 Your life is what makes you rich, the people you love and the people who love you back. 

"He really loves you (...) Folks think it's when they beg you to stay, but it's when they let you go that you know they love you so goddamn much."
 
 I didn't know how to comfort a woman who used all of her one good perfume so she wouldn't have to face the aching  truth that even though her father was now dead, what he had done to her would always live. 

My sister was just another girl doomed by politics and ancestral texts that say a girl's destiny is to be wholesome, obedient, and quietly attractive, but invisible when need be. Nailed to the cross of her own gender, a girl finds herself between the mother and the prehistoric rib, where there is little space to be anything other than a daughter who lives alongside sons but is not equal to them. These boys who can howl like tomcats in heat, pawing their way through a feast of flesh, never to be called a slut or a whore like my sister was.
 
 Dad once told me a Cherokee legend about two wolves. One wolf was named U-so-nv-i because it was evil, dishonest, and bent in spirit. The other wolf was named Uu-yu-go-dv because it was truthful, kind and good. "The wolves live inside all of us," Dad had said. "They fight until one of them is killed." 
When I asked which wolf lives, he said, "The one you nourish and love."

- I don't know if I've ever told you that I love you, Little Indian. I don't know if I've ever said those words. 
 - You said them every time you told me a story (...) Have I ever told you I loved you? 
- Every time you listened to one of my stories. 

Growing up, I felt like I had sheets of paper stuck to my skin. Written on these sheets were words I'de been called. Pow-wow Polly, Tomahawk Kid, Pocahontas, half-breed, Injun Squaw. I began to define myself and my existence by everything I was told I was, which was that I was nothing. Because of this, the road of my life narrowed into a path of darkness until the path itself flooded and became a swamp I struggled to walk through. 
I would have spent my whole life walkin' this swamp had it not been for my father. It was Dad who planted trees along the edge of the swamp. In the trees' branches, he hang light for me to see through the darkness. Every word he spoke to me grew fruit in between this light. Fruit which ripened into sponges. When these sponges fell from the branches into the swamp, they drank in the water until I was standin' in only the mud that was left. When I looked down, I saw my feet were hands, their fingers curled up into around my soles. These hands were familiar to me. Garden dirt under the fingernails. How could I not know they were the hands of my father? 
When I took a step forward, the hands took it with me. I realized then that the whole time I thought I'd been walking alone, my father had been with me. Supportin' me. Steadyin' me. Protectin' me, best he could. I knew I  had to be strong enough to stand on my own two feet. I had to step out of my father's hands and pull myself up out of the mud. I thought I would be scared to walk the rest of my life without him, but I know I'll never really be without him because each step I take, I see his handprints in the footprints I leave behind. 

Ain't never been a curse, Lint. There is no supernatural hardship to our life. Only our fear that there is. I'm tired of bein'  afraid I'm too cursed to live.
 

Titre original: Betty
Titre français : Betty
Auteur : Tiffany McDaniel
Première édition : 2020

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